How Posh is my Neighbourhood?
SS7 3PL Neighbourhood in Castle Point is
says Lord Cholmondeley.
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By George! I'm frightfully disappointed to place you rather firmly at the lower end of society. You seem like such a delightful old bean, but I'm afraid mummy would not let me become associated with riffraff from Castle Point. Even Thundersley is a classier place to live. Honestly, old bean, you're better off leaving Essex as soon as you possibly can. Have you thought about moving to a decent area, such as Weir? I've heard there are a few nicer terraced properties up for sale in your price range there.
It's marvellous that you have a slightly better education than some of the oiks I've come across. What a spiffing time you must have had at The King John School in Castle Point. But come on, my good man. Stop dressing your children in Tesco school uniform. You'll never reach the dizzy heights of middle class if you dress your offspring with cheap clothes.
I say, what a frightful inconvenience living in Castle Point. What a beastly area. Jeeves had to drive the Bentley through a red light just to avoid stopping in such a deprived area. Poor chap. All those council houses certainly bring out the worst in people, wouldn't you say?
Jolly sad to hear you need to head down to the pawn brokers in Thundersley to afford your family holiday at Butlins this year. My housekeeper has told me that there is a vacancy in my kitchen staff. Do let me know if you're interested, old chap. We would be delighted to offer you a minimum wage. Just don't steal the family silver. It's been handed down for centuries and it's worth a small fortune. If you want to discuss, then meet me at Boyce Hill Golf & Country Club in South Benfleet sometime soon. Just don't talk to the other members, in case they think we're chums.
Must tootle orf now, old chap. Pip pip.
Oh, before I shoot off and get squiffy with my chums at the country club, if you are curious to find out more about your neighbourhood, then grab yourself a copy of a ZoomLocal Neighbourhood Report. Those clever chaps can give you a proper report that reveals everything you need to know about your neighbourhood. Chop chop.
P.s. Don't forget to share your score with others to tell them all about Lord Cholmondeley's How Posh are You?